Wait a minute!!! What am I doing here???
A week ago I was sending in my loan application for the house we were buying in Lake Havasu City, Arizona. I was on Pinterest creating boards for Southwest Landscaping, Southwest architecture, Southwest decor, Southwest outdoor living. I was on Houzz looking at remodeling ideas. I was looking at pontoon boats and dune buggies. Our business property here in Oregon was awaiting closing and I was really excited about the new adventure on the horizon.
So let's take care of some loose ends like eye exams, pap smears, mammograms while we wait for everything to line up for our move. The mammogram needed further views so back I go and by the way....let's just do a sonogram while we are at it. The radiologist came in after the test and explained there was a shadow on the film that needed further investigation and needle biopsy. So back I went on April 7th. Now we wait for the results.
On Thursday April 9th my sweetie calls me and I was a walking into Walmart at the time. He said...."are you sitting down?" Not thinking I would think it was about my test results. The moment blurred and he said......our house loan was denied. I started laughing uncontrollably.
At that perfect moment in time.....number one.....I knew my results would be positive and number two....I felt the perfect timing hand of God on my shoulder. On Friday April 10th, 2015 the radiologist called with my test results. Invasive ductal carcinoma of the right breast.
In one nano second.....everything I had been planning and hoping for took a backseat to what I was now facing. I instantly started searching on the internet for information about my cancer. Nothing sounded too great and couple that with my background of being in the medical field all sounded even less great. I literally walked around in circles for a bit letting the news sink in and dissolve in my mind.
On Sunday April 12, 2015, as I was leaving for church, I told my husband I needed to see a rainbow today.
Anyone who knows me well, knows that rainbows are what God sends me when I need to know he is watching over me. Tom said...there is not a cloud in the sky.....I don't think we will see a rainbow. And then Pastor Brian preached about The Cross and in that message....he said...."and maybe God gives some people cancer so they can share God's love with others. Instantly I knew this was my rainbow, my assurance that everything was okay and I now knew God's mission for me with this disease. Oh....it gets better. God lead me to a small book that one of my favorite pastors' wrote....Don't Waste your Cancer" by John Piper and everything just fell into place in my mind.
On Thursday April 16 I saw Dr. David Cook at The Oregon Clinic at Providence St Vincent Medical Center. God could not have arranged a better physician for me. He was down to earth, honest, compassionate and thorough in his explanation of all the who-what-where and what ifs there were.
I asked if it would be okay to take the trip we were planning before the surgery and he laughed and said...."probably a good idea cause I'm going fishing in Mexico with my college buddies for the next week" Yes....go and enjoy yourself and we will tend to this the early part of May.
So....off we are going to Lake Havasu City for some fun in the sun. On May 13th 2015, I will have a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy as an outpatient. Once this heals, I will have approximately 5 weeks of radiation therapy and depending on node involvement possibly chemotherapy. Dr Cook called this moment in my life "a bump in the road".
What do I call this moment in my life??? It's a time to share the light within me that shines brightly for my Jesus.
It's a time to come up with a Mantra.....and that is...."God is good ALL the time" and ALL the time God is good.
It's a time to look Cancer square in the face and say...."You are not the focus, you are a mere disease, you are not an idol and for too long you have caused fear in the hearts of man as some evil thing"....
Cancer.....you are NOT evil....SIN is evil and you are the result of SIN in this world and yes you bring death to our body but Jesus beat you and he brings LIFE in spirit and finally a new body on the new earth to all those who believe.
So it's time to remember Matthew 6:25-27
Do Not Worry
25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your lifee ?
Forever your child......Stephanie (rosie)
Forever your child......Stephanie (rosie)
4 comments:
All his blessings
Dear Rosie,
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. You are certainly a rainbow in the lives of so many, including mine.
Love,
Dawn
Thank you both for your prayers and for all the inspiration you give me for my life and my work. Hugs!!!! Rosie
Steph,
Just read your blog post. Your words are so true and so appropriate in times such as these. You are one tough cookie - and you CAN beat this......
Love you,
Catherine
Post a Comment